Ep. 122 Your Summer Body Image Pep-Talk

[00:00:00] As we head into summer, a season filled with pool days, vacation, and lots of pictures, and maybe time in a swimsuit, I know body image struggles can creep in. So that's why this week I am bringing back one of the most listened to and loved episodes of the podcast, where I shared my personal struggle about a year ago, last summer, when I was just having a really difficult time with body image.

[00:00:26] And so whether you're struggling to feel confident in your skin or just needing a reminder of your true worth, I hope this episode speaks truth into your heart and is really the pep talk that you need to tackle your body image struggles as we head into the summer season.

[00:00:46] So let's take some time this week to step into a summer that is grounded in God's love and God's truth about our bodies, instead of the lies of diet culture and the pressure that we feel from society when it comes to our bodies and our summer season. Welcome to the Nourished to Bloom podcast, where your faith meets your health.

[00:01:14] I'm your host Kara Trochta, a registered dietitian and certified Catholic coach, and I'm here to help you cultivate a deeper connection with your body, your spirit, and the nourishment that sustains them both. In a world filled with noise and confusion about food, health, and body image, this podcast offers truth and healing from a Christ-centered perspective.

[00:01:35] Together, we'll untangle the deep roots of diet culture and discover what it means to truly care for ourselves through joyful nourishment of mind, body, and soul. We're here to dive into the transformative power of intuitive eating coupled with the rich teachings of our Christian faith. With every episode, I'll be cheering you on, offering insights, inspiration, and practical tools to help you heal your relationship with food and embrace the beauty of your body as a temple of the Holy Spirit.

[00:02:05] With confidence and courage that can only be found in Christ. Join me as we journey together towards a more holistic approach to wellness, one that honors the wisdom of your body as God's creation, the teachings of our faith, and the unique purpose you're called to fulfill. You were made to bloom, to come into full beauty and health in order to bear good fruit for the Lord with your life.

[00:02:30] So if you're ready to nourish your body, feed your soul, and bloom into the best version of yourself, then you're in the right place and I'm so happy you're here. Welcome to Nourish to Bloom, where every day is a sacred invitation to thrive. So I'm doing things a little different in this episode.

[00:02:49] I had this episode all planned out and a script typed up and I just really felt on my heart that I needed to share what I was going through right now instead. Because one of my promises to you with the podcast was to be authentic and to share the truth and be transparent and share my experiences. And so today I'm speaking from the heart and sharing kind of my current struggles with body image.

[00:03:17] It's something that can come and go sometimes. And so I just wanted to share with you because I'm experiencing it right now, what this is looking like for me and how I am navigating it. I think all too often we can hear people or we can see things on social media that is just a snapshot, right? It's the picture perfect thing that they want you to hear or see. And it isn't always the truth.

[00:03:42] And I've had a lot of experiences in these last few months of just being a part of things or seeing things and experiencing things where people didn't operate with integrity. And so I always want to do that. And so I'm going to share these struggles that I'm going through and just know that being an intuitive eater is not always easy. There's no perfect magic button that makes all of this go away.

[00:04:09] But I hope that in sharing my current struggles that I can give you a message of hope and give you a message that you can learn how to manage these things and move past them and not be stuck. And not let any sort of negative thoughts about your body pull you down into a downward spiral. Summer tends to be a really difficult time, at least for me when it comes to body image.

[00:04:37] Summer brings on a lot of struggles as it is anyway with kids being out of school and trying to manage some of the chaos and the lack of structure and routine that comes with that. But I think I'm seeing a pattern, at least for me, of that summer tends to be a time that I really struggle with body image. And just I think part of the reason why I'm feeling uncomfortable and just not good about my body is I feel like I have maybe gained some weight or my body has changed somehow.

[00:05:08] Now, I don't really know that that's true because I don't weigh myself. I haven't weighed myself for several years now and I don't really have any intention to weigh myself because honestly, I wouldn't know what if any gain would be because I haven't weighed myself in so long. And honestly, because I know that weighing myself will just bring on so much mental and emotional havoc. And I really don't want that. I am choosing.

[00:05:36] That's a conscious choice that I am making to not put myself in that position to have the mental and emotional backlash that comes with the scale and weighing. And so anyway, I'm just feeling uncomfortable. And so the reasons why I think I might be struggling is one, just kind of how I physically feel right now. And two, the way that my clothes are fitting.

[00:06:02] And so, like I said, I was on this walk with my friend and I told her, you know, here's my struggle, right? I just physically feel kind of like blah. And then like I'm so frustrated because I go to the store and I go to try on clothes that are in the size that I have worn for several years now, only to put them on, to try them on. And they feel tight and they feel uncomfortable. Like despite the fact that I've been wearing the same size and clothing for several years. And it's just not making a whole lot of sense.

[00:06:32] And so it's causing this kind of mental back and forth in my head, right? Like it's frustrating to go try something on and it feels tight and uncomfortable. And then like makes you think negative thoughts about your body, right? But this whole thing about having clothes at home that fit and then going to the store and trying on the same size and not have them fit doesn't add up. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense, right?

[00:06:56] So if I kind of logically think about this, I have this theory and I cannot prove it, but it leads me to think that every few years clothing manufacturers mess with the sizings on things. Because there have been times in the past where I've been a small in something. And then like a couple years later, I go and I try it on and it's like, okay, no, I need a medium. But then a couple of years after that, the mediums are too big and I have to go back to a small, right? So it's just this constant back and forth.

[00:07:26] Again, I said I can't prove that this is what's happening, but it's just this is what I'm experiencing. And in experiencing this, it's kind of causing this negative body image to kind of to pop up because it's making me think that something's changed or it's making me think that I've done something wrong. When the reality is much of what I have done has not changed at all, at least as far as my eating habits go.

[00:07:52] So this is my theory that they just change sizes and the manufacturers mess with them every so many years. And so this is like talk about like working in cahoots with diet culture, right? It ensures that people are always buying clothes and then it ensures people are always trying to lose weight. So like I said, can't prove it, but it really, really makes me wonder.

[00:08:15] And so in the fact that this is one of the struggles that I'm having, one of the things that I'm doing is, you know, just sizing up, right? It's really not about the number on the tag. It's not about what the size is. It's really about being comfortable in the clothes that you're wearing. And so that might mean that you have to size up. And it's the thing is, is it varies from brand to brand and label to label.

[00:08:40] And so just that's one of the things that I'm really focused on is grabbing multiple different sizes and just trying things on because you just never know what it's going to be. So that's kind of how I'm handling that situation because I just if I look at like the logic and the truth of it, if the clothes that I have at home are fitting and they're the same size as what I'm trying on, then it's really not my body. That is the problem, right?

[00:09:09] And I and I have to rest in that. I have to believe that. But it does take a little bit of effort. But I know that despite all of this, despite the fact that maybe I've gained some weight, despite the fact that I'm feeling uncomfortable in my body, I know that I cannot and I will not go on a diet because I know the truth that it's going to cause more damage than it does good in the long run.

[00:09:32] And honestly, just the thought of having to follow something so strict and so rigid or count calories or gosh, whatever that would look like. It just it's like gives me this cringe factor. And I like I just can't do it. I can't go back to obsessing about weight and obsessing about food because y'all got to a point where I enjoy my life too much. I enjoy the things that I get to focus on.

[00:10:01] I get to enjoy focusing on my kids. I get to enjoy focusing on building this business that's helping women. And I get to enjoy taking time for the things that are really important, like growing in my relationship with the Lord and my family and my husband. Like I enjoy my life too darn much to fall back into that dieting trap. And I also know that fixating on losing weight is not what is going to help me with my current body image struggles.

[00:10:33] And I had to get really curious about it. And I asked myself, OK, Kara, if you're struggling with your body right now, why? Like why? What are you going through? What could be the reasons why you were feeling uncomfortable in your body? And while maybe I have gained weight, like I said, I don't know.

[00:10:51] I can think of some other things, some other habits, some other behaviors, some other things that are going on that may be attributing to just me being uncomfortable in my body. And so one of them that I think I've come to the realization of, it's summer and it's hot. The sweating and the heat, I think, can really make you feel very uncomfortable in your body just because you're more aware of it, right?

[00:11:20] You're more aware of what you're experiencing, what you're feeling, the sweat on your body and like the sweat in not fun places, right? And so you're just kind of like hyper aware of that and hyper aware of your body. And you just like sweating and that heat, it just makes you feel gross, right? And so somewhere along the way, it's kind of like we make this connection of like then your body feels gross. And that's just really not true.

[00:11:48] The other thing about it being summer and it's hot is that there's a lot of likelihood of water retention because of the heat. And like that can lead to swelling and that could be attributing to just feeling uncomfortable, right? Like just your hands are always swelling, maybe your feet are swelling and it just makes you feel swollen, right? And you don't really like the way that that feels. At least that's kind of what I'm realizing and experiencing.

[00:12:17] Another thing that I think is attributing to this body image struggle is that it's summer and it's swimsuit season. And this is a tough one. Like just by the nature of it being summer, it's swimsuit season, which can be rough for anyone who has struggled with body image. Because by default, we're wearing less clothing and that can make you hyper focused on your body and how it looks.

[00:12:44] And also bathing suits can be kind of tight and constricting, which again makes you hyper aware of how your body is feeling. And like if you factor the heat into that, when I'm feeling hot, like I don't enjoy wearing tight clothing. So swimsuits can be very, very uncomfortable. And I think, you know, I also personally don't like to show a lot of cleavage. I like to kind of protect my upper chest area.

[00:13:13] A lot of it due to like skin cancer type of things. But I just don't feel comfortable wearing like low cut swimsuits or low cut shirts. And it's really difficult to find swimsuits that don't have that level of exposure. And so if you feel like you're kind of like constantly tugging and pulling to like cover yourself up or pull, you know, the bottoms down as they're riding up again, it just creates this hyper awareness of your body and associations of like, well, that shouldn't happen.

[00:13:42] Or if I was just in a smaller body, this wouldn't happen. And that's just really not the truth. And so it can be really difficult to find swimsuits that you actually feel comfortable in. And then I am personally very cautious with sun exposure just due to the fact that I'm very fair skinned. I have a lot of moles on my skin.

[00:14:04] I've had some personal experiences with people who have died rather suddenly from melanoma because it was. It spread very quickly. And so I am just very hyper focused on limiting my sun exposure. And so with that swim swimwear can just swimwear can just be challenging.

[00:14:27] But I do also know that despite this, despite the fact that I really don't feel very comfortable in swimsuits, I haven't found one that I feel like I actually love. But I also know that I can't let those thoughts or that negativity that comes with that keep me from enjoying jumping in a pool on a hot day or going to the beach and making memories with my kids and my family.

[00:14:53] Like that's going to far outweigh whatever I have on my body as far as a swimsuit. And so it's really starting to make me think and plan forward of like, what are my other options besides a swimsuit, right? Maybe it's more of a board short and a sports bra top and a sun shirt over that, right? Or they have like 10 just looking today, like maybe it's a swim dress. I saw this really cool like swim romper thing that looks neat.

[00:15:20] And I was like, that could be pretty functional and comfortable for at the beach. So just really like working towards choosing clothes and choosing swimwear that makes me feel comfortable and allows me to show up and be, you know, the mom and be the friend and be the wife that I want to be when we're in these different situations of making memories and being, you know, in the water and at the beach and whatnot.

[00:15:48] The third kind of realization I had of why I might be struggling with my body image right now is it's summer and we have zero routine or structure. And if you are a mom who's in the summer and you have some really great structured routine, like that's fantastic. Like I'm really, really glad and happy that you can make that work for you.

[00:16:12] So it's not something that is working really well for us because our days and our weeks are kind of all over the place. Like there's times that our kids, my kids have camp one week and then the next week we don't have anything. And then the next week we're going on vacation. So it gets really difficult to try to get into any sort of routine. And so that means that I am all out of whack and the kids are all out of whack.

[00:16:38] And so just being out of whack, I think is really playing into that because I don't, there's no predictability, right? And because I don't have a routine, I'm not doing the habits and the things that I normally do when my kids are in school. And so that means that, you know, there's, there's some room for growth. There's, there's some room to kind of evaluate, like, how can I go back and make some of these things a priority? But I do believe that this is a huge factor in me being uncomfortable in my body right now,

[00:17:08] because without having sort of any sort of routine or structure, like, and it's summer, I'm just staying up later than I normally do during the school year. And so I know that I'm not getting enough sleep because like my husband still has to get up and go to work. So it's not like I really have the opportunity to sleep in there. And so, you know, I'm also, because I'm not going to bed at kind of my normal time, I'm also not getting up early to spend time with scripture or do my devotional,

[00:17:37] which is very, very important for my headspace. And so I've just kind of gotten lazy with that. And it's not something that I really want to admit, but it's true. I have kind of gotten lazy with it. And so, you know, that's definitely playing into it because I'm, I'm kind of getting infiltration from the enemy and from other things that I'm seeing. And I'm not going to the source of where I need to find truth to start my day or to kind of reassure

[00:18:07] me or equip me with kind of that truth and that those thoughts that I need to, to get through the day and not be kind of worried or uncomfortable in, in my body. Because I don't have any sort of routine or structure, I'm not really committed to an exercise routine. Like some mornings I get to go for a walk, but I'm not being able to maybe incorporate

[00:18:31] some of those other types of exercise or activity that, you know, really help with the strength building or the core or our bar, the ways that I enjoy moving my body. And so, because I've kind of slowed down on that, I'm not, you know, I'm not using the muscles the way that I was. And so there's just kind of, I feel that physically in, in my body. And so not having this, you know, kind of routine as, you know, playing into that uncomfortableness in, in my own body.

[00:19:02] It's also summer. And so because we're on vacation, because we don't really have this routine, we're taking more trips. We're also eating out more. And so I know that I'm not, you know, necessarily able to focus on getting the nutrient dense foods that I enjoy and that keep me feeling good. And so that also is playing into how I'm feeling about my body, because when I eat well and I nourish my body well, I feel good.

[00:19:28] The other thing about it being summer is there's just, I'm drinking more alcohol than I normally do because it's just fun to sit by the pool and enjoy a cocktail with friends. Right. And so you kind of fall into that habit of like, oh, it's summer happy hour, or let's have a cocktail to kind of, you know, in the day, beat the heat kind of thing. So I think all of these things are just this lack of routine, this lack of structure. It's just kind of one domino after the other. And that's definitely impacting the way that I'm feeling.

[00:19:58] And I think really the last thing is that I think I'm dealing, I think some stress from the last few months are, is really catching up to me. Um, so over the last few months, my husband's company was being bought out and that caused a lot of uncertainty in our family. We didn't really know what that meant for us. We didn't know if it, if it meant that we had to move. We didn't know if it meant that my husband would have a job, you know, what were we going to do with the kids?

[00:20:25] If we moved, um, would we want to move with this company? Um, if he's was offered a severance, would we take that just all sorts of these uncertainty things. And within this, I'm kind of a naturally optimistic person. I just kind of just have this natural like attitude of it's all going to work out. My husband is kind of the complete opposite. So through all of this, I had to be the encourager and reassure him and reassure the kids that

[00:20:55] like, it's all going to be okay. We're, we're going to figure this out. Like God has always been on our side. He's always provided for us. He's not going to stop now. He's been with us through everything, every decision that we've made up until this point, and he's not going to stop now. Um, and you know, it's all worked out great. Everything's good. We, we aren't having to move. Um, my husband was able to accept a job with a new company. Like it's going to be fine, but I still think that I'm experiencing maybe some lingering

[00:21:22] stress and some lingering feelings from going through that experience. And they're kind of manifesting themselves physically right now. And so I don't want you to think that I'm using any of these things as an excuse, but it was just a way to kind of paint a picture of like how, as an intuitive eater, how I kind of go through these different puzzle pieces and really get curious about why I'm feeling a certain way or why I'm experiencing this certain thing.

[00:21:49] Because when you are kind of stuck in that diet culture mentality, everything goes back to blaming yourself that you didn't lose weight or the answer to every problem is just to lose weight. And then the answer to every time this doesn't work is that you just didn't try hard enough or there's something wrong with you. And an intuitive eating really helped you learn that that is not true. Intuitive eating really helps you start to dig deep and get curious and see, huh, what haven't I thought of?

[00:22:18] What could be a contributing factor to this? And so I'm just using this as a kind of a way to kind of paint a picture of how all these factors could be affecting the way that I'm feeling about my body because I have that level of self-awareness. And that's what I aim to teach you in any of my intuitive eating programs is to help build that self-awareness instead of that all or nothing mindset that diet mentality tries to put out there.

[00:22:44] You know, some of these factors could be affecting me on it like individually how I'm feeling while others, some of these could be compounding together, especially like that routine, right? Like not having routine means this, this, and this. All of that's compounding together and creating this cascade that's leading to my struggles. And so while I can't control the situation, right? I do know that I can control my thoughts about how I'm feeling about this.

[00:23:11] And if I can control my thoughts, I can change the feeling and I can change the actions. So instead of beating myself up or feeling like, okay, Kara, you're uncomfortable in your body. That means that you need to lose weight and change your body. I can instead lean on the Lord and surrender the struggle to him because he knows suffering better than anybody. And he'll be by my side through all of this struggle, through all of this difficulty.

[00:23:37] And I know that there are some things that I can change. There are some things that I can work on that can make this struggle less of a struggle. And I also know that this isn't going to last forever. School will start again in August. And I know that just a big one is like being back on some sort of routine is really going to help me. And so part of it is just being patient, right?

[00:24:05] Part of it is just knowing like, okay, at this point in time and this season, this might not change. I might still struggle through this, but I know that I can't, I know that I have a choice to not let it completely undo me, right? And so I can know that I can be patient and realize, okay, what I am called to do right now is to be mom to my kids during the summer. And that means that some of these other things are going to go by the wayside. And if the consequence of that means that I'm having some body image struggles, then that's

[00:24:35] just kind of where I am. But it also gives me that, again, that opportunity to work through this, to work through my emotions, to do the mindset work and to trust in the Lord. But patience is not always easy. And I get that, but just, I think it's just, again, that surrender piece. And I can work on making some adjustments and really making some better choices that will help me manage these body image struggles this summer.

[00:24:59] So I can really be focused on how God is calling me to serve and the vocation that he's calling me to live in this particular season. For example, I can make sure that I'm in bed and the lights are out by a certain reasonable time each weekday, right? So I've been staying up later on the weekdays. Maybe I go back to setting myself up for a bedtime during the week so then I can enjoy a later night on the weekends.

[00:25:28] I also know that I might not be able to incorporate the variety of exercise I want. I know that I can commit to moving my body in some way for 20 to 30 minutes a few times to, you know, most days out of the week. Going for a walk and inviting the kids to go along. Putting on the rollerblades and getting everybody out there, right? And this is where, you know, getting outside and having to break that up can be really, really key. I also know that I can cut back on the alcohol I'm drinking.

[00:25:58] And know that, like, I can still enjoy spending time with friends and I am still a fun person even if I am not drinking. I think sometimes I feel really pressured to drink to make sure that, like, I'm fun or I'm having a good time or that, you know, my friends are going to enjoy being around me, right? And the thing is that that's not true. Like, my friends enjoy being around me even when I'm sober and I can enjoy things more

[00:26:26] and not have, you know, kind of this side effect of drinking too much alcohol kind of get in the way. So that's just something that, again, the mindset work of what is true and what is not true. Where is the enemy trying to sneak in and make me believe these lies? I also know that I can work on managing my stress by ensuring that I have good coping skills, really going back to my devotional and scripture reading in the morning to kind of set myself up

[00:26:53] on the right foot for the rest of the day. So then I'm in a good headspace as I'm parenting throughout the day. I know that getting good sleep and managing my mindset will also help me manage my stress. And guys, like, just that bottom line is I can choose my thoughts. I can choose what I think about myself and my body. And what I choose is to root what I believe about myself and what God says about me, not what the world is saying.

[00:27:23] And you have that choice too. You can choose to root what you believe about yourself and about your body and what God's truth is. Y'all, being an intuitive eater and living a faith-led wellness lifestyle is not always easy. There's no perfection to be found in it. But I do know that if you were to become an intuitive eater and you really lived a faith-led

[00:27:48] wellness lifestyle, you can learn how to manage these struggles when they come up because they don't go away completely. But you can learn how to manage them without it leading to a downward spiral. You can learn to move past them and you can, like, just rest in knowing that you are a beloved daughter. And because of that, you don't need to worry about these things. And it's so temporary.

[00:28:14] So just know that, again, I'm sharing from the heart. I'm speaking kind of what I'm experiencing because you may be experiencing it too. I feel like it was a little risky because not all of you are as far along in your intuitive eating journey as I am. And I don't ever want to kind of scare you away from the hope that this can bring by sharing, you know, any of the struggles that I go through.

[00:28:40] But I really believe strongly in the truth and integrity and being transparent with you and never promising you something that could never be delivered on. Like, there are no guarantees in life. But I do know that this journey is the one for me. And I believe it's the one for so many of you. So just trust that, right?

[00:29:08] Just know that you're more than your body, that you don't have to be a victim to these body image struggles and that there are ways that you can move past it and that you can get to a point of acceptance and even confidence. I will fully admit that there are times like I am so confident in my body and what it does for me. And that there's just sometimes these things that happen that pop up and it kind of hits you out of nowhere. And you're like, oh, wow.

[00:29:35] But if you get curious, you can usually get to the bottom of it, usually get to the root of it and managing that mindset and managing those thoughts and then taking the actions that you can can really help you move past that in a very effective and efficient way.