Ep. 12 How to Find Freedom from Emotional Eating

[00:00:03] This human life can be hard. We all go through things. There are some days that really just take it out of you.

[00:00:12] The never-ending to do list, the worry about your kids, your marriage or finances.

[00:00:17] From the moment we wake up until we lay our heads down at night, we are bump-barded with chaos and noise and information and decisions that we have to make.

[00:00:28] It's like we're just swirling in this storm. And the same is true for our emotions throughout the day.

[00:00:35] The rollercoaster of the ups and downs trying to manage our own emotions plus our kids.

[00:00:42] It's no wonder many of us turn to food in times of stress or worry or anxiety or loneliness or frustration,

[00:00:50] or as reward for just making it through the battlefield of your day-to-day.

[00:00:54] We long for that comfort and that calm and that peace.

[00:00:59] We want to be just, I don't know, wrapped in this hug and like, help tight and just told that it's all going to be okay.

[00:01:09] We are trying to comfort something deep inside of us and in our hearts and in our minds.

[00:01:15] We know that God can offer us what we are seeking.

[00:01:19] But yet, there are times that it just seems like he's not there.

[00:01:24] We can't feel him or see him.

[00:01:27] And so we end up reaching for something tangible, like food or alcohol or scrolling through social media as a way to buffer these emotions.

[00:01:37] We run to these things over and over again instead of turning to the Lord.

[00:01:43] I heard someone once say that when we're stuck in emotional eating,

[00:01:48] we're trying to feed our soul like it's a hungry stomach.

[00:01:52] While food and some of these other things may give you a moment of comfort or distraction,

[00:01:59] it doesn't truly satisfy what your soul is longing for.

[00:02:03] It doesn't satisfy what your soul is seeking.

[00:02:07] Psalm 62 verse 8 reminds us that our God is a God who cares enough to hear every anxious thought that stirs within our minds.

[00:02:17] He is a sanctuary for his people.

[00:02:20] We can find solace in the safety of his presence.

[00:02:25] Y'all, these emotions, these troubles, these worries, anything that you're dealing with that leaves me.

[00:02:32] And dealing with that lead you to seek comfort and food can also be what lead you to seek comfort in the Lord.

[00:02:40] If we learn how to use and process our emotions in a healthier way and establish a healthy relationship with food,

[00:02:48] I spent many years as a self-proclaimed emotional eater and thought it was just part of my personality.

[00:02:55] But emotional eating is a learned behavior.

[00:02:59] It means that you can 100% unlearn turning to food every time you start to feel some uncomfortable emotion.

[00:03:07] So in today's episode, we're going to dig into those triggers, those emotional triggers that lead you to emotional eating.

[00:03:14] And I'll share some practical steps that you can take to begin being able to process your emotions in a way that doesn't involve food.

[00:03:26] So the nourished of bloom podcasts where you're faith meets your health.

[00:03:30] I'm your host, Cara Traktor, a registered dietitian and certified Catholic coach,

[00:03:34] and I'm here to help you cultivate a deeper connection with your body, your spirit, and the nourishment that sustains them both.

[00:03:41] In a world filled with noise and confusion about food, health and body image,

[00:03:46] the podcast offers truth and healing from a Christ's inner perspective.

[00:03:51] Together we'll untangle the deep roots of diet culture and discover what it means to truly care for ourselves,

[00:03:57] through joyful nourishment of mind, body, and soul.

[00:04:01] We heard a dive into the transformative power of intuitive eating, coupled with the rich teachings of our Christian faith.

[00:04:07] With every episode I'll be cheering you on, offering insights, inspiration, and practical tools to help you heal your relationship with food,

[00:04:16] and embrace the beauty of your body as a temple of the Holy Spirit.

[00:04:20] With confidence and courage that can only be found in Christ.

[00:04:25] Join me as we journey together towards a more holistic approach to wellness,

[00:04:29] when that honors the wisdom of your body as God's creation, the teaching of our faith and the unique purpose you're called to the film.

[00:04:37] You were made to bloom, to come into full beauty and health in order to bear good fruit for the Lord with your life.

[00:04:45] So if you're ready to nourish your body, feed your soul and bloom into the best version of yourself,

[00:04:50] then you're in the right place and I'm so happy you're here.

[00:04:54] Welcome to Nurs to Bloom.

[00:04:56] Where every day is a sacred invitation to thrive.

[00:05:00] Hey there!

[00:05:05] Welcome back!

[00:05:06] A so glad to have you tuned into this episode of the podcast, so happy to be here with you today.

[00:05:11] And we're going to be talking about one of my favorite topics, emotional eating.

[00:05:16] If you haven't figured this out by now, like all of the topics, we can go about our favorite topics.

[00:05:21] Just I don't know, I love this intuitive eating framework.

[00:05:26] I love being able to incorporate our faith into it and it just brought so much peace and clarity into my own personal life.

[00:05:34] And I'm so happy to be able to be here and get to share this with you as well.

[00:05:39] I actually had a listener, some me and message earlier this week.

[00:05:44] And it was just like, thanks for sharing this information with those of us who have never heard this before.

[00:05:49] Who have had no idea that things could be different when it came to our health and our wellness and how we approach food and eating.

[00:05:58] And it's really funny because I would 100% agree that for so long I believe these lies.

[00:06:05] And when I really came to understand intuitive eating and to see how.

[00:06:12] Diding impacted my life in such a negative way and intuitive eating gave me so much hope and peace.

[00:06:19] It was like, I don't know, dieting was the wolf disguised in sheep's clothes and it's like the wool was pulled over my eyes for so long 100% pun intended there.

[00:06:30] But it's like all of a sudden this clarity was there and I could see things from a different perspective and really embrace how God was wanting me to not only approach my health and wellness and the way that I ate but just so much of my life.

[00:06:46] So I am so grateful to have each of you here every week when you tune in and listen and I hope that you are getting some really valuable things out of this.

[00:06:56] I would love to hear from you so you know you can hop over and Instagram and just shoot me a DM and let me know what's resonating with you.

[00:07:02] I would really appreciate that but today like I said we're going to dig into emotional eating and emotional eating is something that not only affects us emotionally, but it also affects us physically and mentally.

[00:07:17] It can wreak a lot of havoc on our minds, it can wreak a lot of havoc on our physical bodies as well.

[00:07:26] And so it's you know no wonder that for many people emotional eating is an undesirable behavior or habit but they would love to be able to stop.

[00:07:37] To not have to turn to food to not feel like every time they, you know, are having a bad day or they're stressed out that they end up, you know.

[00:07:46] In the freezer in the refrigerator, in the pantry trying to kind of sue themselves like I saw this funny mean one time that it was like.

[00:07:56] I spend a lot of time standing in front of the refrigerator looking for answers right and that's kind of how we can think about this emotional eating is that we're seeking something comfort clarity to know what the next move is and and we've just been trained and conditioned that.

[00:08:14] Food is the way to do that and so I want to help you just know that it doesn't have to be that way.

[00:08:21] But I also want you to know that eating is one of the most emotionally-laden experiences that we have in our lives.

[00:08:29] And this emotional rhythm and this emotional connection that we have with food and that we have with eating is really set from the day that we are born.

[00:08:38] When the breast or the bottle is offered when a baby cries and that baby's using that crying as a signal that they are hungry.

[00:08:48] They're attuned with those internal hunger signals and it manifests itself as the baby crying in order to get their need met.

[00:08:56] But it's like they had this emotion of hunger or the feeling of hunger and there's emotion tied to it.

[00:09:02] They were frustrated, you know, maybe upset, sad and so they cried and naturally the first bonds is that we try to get their needs met and one of the ways that we do that is by feeding them.

[00:09:16] And I think it's kind of interesting to take a moment and just to ponder like how cool God's design is knowing that infants need to use us as the parents to get their needs met.

[00:09:29] And that we as parents have this really awesome opportunity and responsibility to teach them how to navigate this as they grow up through teaching them about body attuned met and helping them learn to trust their bodies.

[00:09:44] And they're doing this in internal signals and establishing healthy habits that are rooted in our faith and how we are called to live.

[00:09:53] And so how we are raised with regards to our relationship with food, coupled with any dieting efforts that we have ever undertaken.

[00:10:03] We'll determine if emotional eating is something that you struggle with because every time food is used to sue the scraped me or broken heart or to celebrate the big win or

[00:10:13] as a reward for desired behaviors like your kids behaving in a store that emotional connection with food and eating strengthens.

[00:10:22] And for some it becomes a habit to mindlessly reach for food when we feel sad or frustrated or angry or confused because it was used as a soothing mechanism, a way to kind of.

[00:10:38] Buffer or glaze over these emotions throughout our life and so for many people food becomes love and a comfort and reward and a reliable friend who is always there in our times of pain enjoy.

[00:10:55] And so we've learned to do turn to food to temporarily feel better instead of turning to Christ for that lasting reprieve that lasting comfort.

[00:11:07] And when we turn to food for comfort or distraction, it usually leads to us feeling frustrated and guilty for the amount that we ate or what we ate.

[00:11:18] And while we may feel better in the moment.

[00:11:22] Unfortunately, that emotion we were feeling, that original emotion we were feeling, that let us to reach for this food is still lingering.

[00:11:31] It's still unresolved.

[00:11:33] And to top it off, you now not only have that original emotion that's still hanging around but you've added guilt and shame for what you ate or how much you ate on top of this so the emotions just continue to pile up.

[00:11:49] This typically means that because you are feeling guilty and ashamed for turning to food, you fall back into that mentality of like deprivation and restriction that we've talked about in previous episodes where you're so ashamed you're so frustrated that you turn to food and you're like, okay, this is it I'm not going to do this.

[00:12:08] I'm not going to eat the food anymore. You swear off that food and hopes of being able to change that emotional eating behavior that you don't like that you don't want.

[00:12:19] But unfortunately this doesn't work in the long run because you are not getting to the root cause of the issue, the root cause to that of that emotion or that emotional eating episode.

[00:12:31] Your emotional eating behavior is caused by a particular thought or belief you have and when that thought or beliefs pops up and manifests itself as an emotion, you have an autopilot response that leads you to turning to food.

[00:12:49] So in order to be able to stop this emotional eating behavior that you don't want, you have to take things off the autopilot and reset the route that you're taking the route that when this emotion manifests itself.

[00:13:07] It leads to a more desirable and healthier destination and more desirable and healthier way of coping with this emotion.

[00:13:16] So I want to pause for a minute because if you are someone who is struggling with emotional eating, please don't beat yourself up for it.

[00:13:28] My goal as a coach and as an intuitive eating counselor as a dietitian as this podcast host is to help you learn how to better recognize and process your emotions in a healthier way.

[00:13:42] You don't always turn to food to deal with whatever it is you're feeling.

[00:13:46] So I want to offer a different perspective about emotional eating.

[00:13:51] One that offers you compassion and helps you be able to make space for curiosity and learning.

[00:14:00] So we first need to understand what emotions are.

[00:14:05] An emotion is defined as a conscious mental reaction that is personally experienced as a strong feeling.

[00:14:14] It's a physical experience in our body to a thought that we are thinking.

[00:14:20] When we think of thought that thought is brought into consciousness and it actually releases a molecule of emotion in the form of a protein peptide and other chemical messengers that are sent throughout the body.

[00:14:35] And our awareness of these sensations that is caused by these chemical messengers are what we call emotions.

[00:14:43] So that can be a little bit confusing, but if we go back to what we talked about with that mind map, we have this thought and we think this thought it causes us to feel a certain emotion.

[00:14:54] And then from that emotion it determines what actions we're taking and we'll get into this a little bit later a little bit later in the podcast episode, but I want you to know that when you have this thought and you're feeling this emotion that emotion has a physical manifestation.

[00:15:09] It's a physical sensation in your body.

[00:15:14] And that's what this was trying to explain here is that when you have this thought, this thought leads to this release of this molecule of emotion.

[00:15:22] There's like this scientific level to the our emotions and it's really kind of cool when you think about it.

[00:15:29] Right?

[00:15:30] So it has all these cascades of messengers and protein peptides and whatever that's happening in our body, but it causes a physical sensation in our body.

[00:15:39] And that's how we can be more attuned and more alerted to our emotions.

[00:15:44] So what does our faith or the church have to say about our emotions?

[00:15:50] The radicalism of the Catholic Church, Compendinium, I don't say that word correctly.

[00:15:56] I apologize, but number 1764 states that the passion or your emotions, passions are your emotions are natural components of the human psyche.

[00:16:08] The human psyche being our soul, our body spirit intellect and will.

[00:16:12] And they form the passageway and ensure the connection between the life of the senses and the life of the mind.

[00:16:20] So our emotions are a gift from God for us to be able to experience the world we are living in.

[00:16:28] And ensure what we think we feel.

[00:16:32] So I want you to start to think about your emotions, your feelings as clues in your body.

[00:16:40] Clues that maybe something is going on in our minds are our souls or our bodies that we need to address.

[00:16:48] And God created you that way.

[00:16:50] God created this cool thing to happen in your body that when you think this thought and you have this emotion,

[00:16:56] giving you a clue to say, hey, like, I'll learn over here, red flag we got to deal with this.

[00:17:02] And so each emotion we experience has that physical manifestation in your body.

[00:17:08] Like how cool is that?

[00:17:10] That God created us with these clues to help us live better.

[00:17:14] I want you to stop and think about it.

[00:17:17] So when you're feeling excited, where do you feel it in your body?

[00:17:23] Maybe it comes out as, like, kind of your heart beating faster.

[00:17:28] Or you just kind of have this energy flowing through your body that, like, you're, you just can't sit still because you're just so excited about this thing.

[00:17:37] What about when you're feeling anxious?

[00:17:40] Where do you feel that in your body?

[00:17:44] I know for me anxiety presents itself as, like, just this nervous stomach.

[00:17:52] Just kind of an upset stomach.

[00:17:54] And so I definitely know when I'm struggling with anxiety because my body is telling me through my stomach and this nervous, anxious butterfly feeling like, hey, you are feeling anxious.

[00:18:08] Let's figure out how to deal with this anxiety.

[00:18:11] And now that I have these coping mechanisms and I know how to process my emotions, I can do that.

[00:18:17] An anxiety doesn't dictate how I operate on a day-to-day basis.

[00:18:22] I can wake up in the morning feeling super anxious about something and when I go through the steps that I'm going to share towards into this podcast,

[00:18:31] I can help alleviate that anxiety and it doesn't bring me down for the whole day.

[00:18:37] That's, I mean, if you struggle with anxiety, like, how cool would that be for you?

[00:18:43] Like, how life giving would that be for you to be able to not let anxiety be that overriding, I don't know control mechanism for your day.

[00:18:56] So when I said if you struggle with emotional eating, don't beat yourself up for it.

[00:19:02] I want you to realize that in those moments, that each time that you turn to food, really recognize and realize that you were trying to take care of yourself the best way you knew how in that moment.

[00:19:21] You were able kind of unconsciously, right? You didn't have an awareness piece right there.

[00:19:28] But you kind of just subconsciously realize and recognize like, hey, something is kind of off or uncomfortable.

[00:19:37] And you were just trying to take care of yourself the best way that you knew how in that moment.

[00:19:44] So up until this point, turning to food may have been the best way you've known how to take care of yourself.

[00:19:50] But you've also likely realized that you don't like the side effects of emotional eating.

[00:19:57] The fact that it typically leads to overeating, that it leads to guilt and this knowing that you aren't taking care of yourself really the way that you want to.

[00:20:08] That this emotional eating is a habit that you would like to break.

[00:20:14] Unfortunately, we've grown up in a society that really views emotions as a weakness or something we should just get over or suppress.

[00:20:26] Now, thankfully, I think we are starting to see a shift in realizing that they're the need for us to better process and cope with our emotions as we are becoming more aware of our mental health.

[00:20:40] Since some of these issues and these mental health struggles are the result of unresolved emotional struggles that had built up over time.

[00:20:49] Emotional eating is a learned behavior despite the fact that it can seem hereditary.

[00:20:57] This is not something that you inherited from your mom or your dad or your grandmother.

[00:21:03] Emotional eating is not something that is passed on.

[00:21:06] It is something that has learned, now you may have learned it from your mom or your dad or your grandparents.

[00:21:13] I'm going to use the example as a sweet tooth, right? How many times do we hear people say, I have I just have such a sweet tooth.

[00:21:22] I laugh personally at myself because I used to tell people I had to speak to all the time.

[00:21:27] And I hear, oh well, you're great grandmother how to sweet tooth or this person how to speak to it.

[00:21:32] And so it created this idea that this emotional eating, this attachment to sweet was something that was hereditary.

[00:21:39] But the reality was that I had an unhealthy relationship with sweets and I had this inability to process my emotions in a healthy way.

[00:21:51] I turned to food and turned to sweets. And once I learned how to make peace with them and I no longer turned to food to deal with my emotions, my sweet tooth went away.

[00:22:03] I don't have a quote, sweet tooth anymore.

[00:22:06] So it's not this emotional eating struggle is not hereditary.

[00:22:10] It is a 100% a learned behavior. So that means that we can unlearn this behavior.

[00:22:18] So we discuss this idea of biological hunger, right? Being able to recognize those hunger cues that hunger comes from our bodies need for energy.

[00:22:29] But this is a very different thing from emotional hunger.

[00:22:34] Emotional eating occurs in response to an emotional hunger that's triggered by feelings that range on this continuum of intensity.

[00:22:43] And these feelings can trigger a range of eating responses from a benign nibble to an out of control binge.

[00:22:52] And so on this continuum of like emotional eating intensity, it begins on one end with like this mild common feeling of pleasure that's associated with food.

[00:23:02] This is what we talked about in the discovering satisfaction principle that seeking pleasure in food is a normal and natural desire that we want to experience this sensory gratification from the food we are eating and the eating experience.

[00:23:18] Remember that satisfaction with meals promotes this natural moderation and natural balance because you have permission to eat what will satisfy you and sustain you.

[00:23:30] This can also decrease the emotional eating episodes because that food will no longer provide that comfort or distraction you are seeking the way it once did.

[00:23:42] Because you were able to have that on a regularly occurring basis and no longer holds that that comfort or that distraction that you're seeking.

[00:23:52] Now this emotional eating continuum continues on with things like eating for comfort or distraction and in more serious cases people will eat to numb or sedate themselves from experiencing any emotions and use this as an escape for escape from feeling pain, sadness, worry, or fear.

[00:24:14] And so this is all occurs on these different varying levels of intensity based off of these emotional trigger triggers we have and it's important to remember that each one of us experiences these emotions in a different way.

[00:24:28] And someone who may be numbing or sedating themselves could have this build up of an unresolved emotion, have experienced some sort of emotional trauma and not leading them to want to escape from whatever it is that they're feeling.

[00:24:46] But each one of us experiences emotional eating on a different level of the continuum.

[00:24:53] And so it's important for us to understand what some of these triggers are that lead us to reaching for food because again remember a lot of times emotional eating is something that can occur, occur mindlessly because we're on this autopilot.

[00:25:06] We don't really know that this is what we are feeling, we just kind of like have this this unidentified feeling in our body and when we have this unidentified feeling we've reached for food in the past and it did the trick.

[00:25:20] And so we have this autopilot.

[00:25:21] So it's important for us to take a moment to recall what some of these triggers are and identify them so we can start to build that awareness.

[00:25:30] It's also important to remember that our thoughts are the root cause for what we are feeling and that these emotions are what direct our actions.

[00:25:42] God wired us to seek our greatest good, which is him.

[00:25:47] But sometimes we get that mixed up and instead seek a lesser temporary good like using food to help us feel better.

[00:25:56] So one of the most common triggers and common reasons that we reach for food when we're not actually hungry is that we are bored.

[00:26:05] Eating is a way to fill the time or make them boring task more tolerable or as a means of procrastinating from doing something you really don't want to do.

[00:26:17] Oftentimes there are many other things that we could do to replace food when we're feeling bored, but what's happened is that over time food may have become the most fun thing to fill our boredom.

[00:26:31] Especially if boredom eating is what is leading you to eat some of these quote unquote for bit in foods.

[00:26:38] It is something that you have learned to reach for to fill a void and for most people has become so mindless they don't even realize that they're doing it.

[00:26:47] Another emotional eating trigger is the idea of reward eating using food as motivation to accomplish a task or for completing something or just getting through our day.

[00:26:59] And this one kind of plays out a lot in how we parent and this can look like us briving our kids with treats if they behave while we're at the grocery store or the doctor's office.

[00:27:12] Or it shows up as rewarding ourselves for working hard to finish a task like cleaning the house or completing that work assignment.

[00:27:21] You just need as a way to make things more tolerable, but it becomes self-perpatch waiting because life is full of ongoing tasks and challenges.

[00:27:33] But when we can make peace with food and have unconditional permission to eat all foods you have the permission to always eat what it is that you like.

[00:27:43] To make eating things that you enjoy conditional or or a reward for completing a certain task.

[00:27:51] It's also important to remember that in these ongoing task and challenges, we need to turn to the Lord instead of trying to fill this void with food.

[00:28:02] We're doing more tolerable that it's an opportunity for us to turn to the Lord and invite him into this moment in whatever it is that we're feeling is is challenging or that we really don't want to do.

[00:28:17] We also seek out food when we're needing comfort and it's hard to ignore that food can offer a soothing power.

[00:28:25] It can be more, applying, it can be more comforting to have the cookies instead of sitting with uncomfortable feelings.

[00:28:36] It distracts you and it gives you temporary feelings of comfort.

[00:28:41] The comfort of food may remind us of times when life was more pleasant, but it doesn't ultimately resolve the issue.

[00:28:50] And I've had many clients who also turned to food to alleviate stress and anxiety to not have to feel that stress or that anxiety.

[00:29:00] But what's interesting is that if you were to look at the biological mechanism of how stress works in the body stress actually turns off the desire to eat.

[00:29:14] The adrenaline rush that sets a cascade of biological events to provide the body with immediate energy when you're in that stress mode because a lot of times stress is like that fight fight or flight mode.

[00:29:29] We feel like there's something we're threatened in some way and so our body actually needs this like burst of energy.

[00:29:36] And so we have this increase in blood sugar and it slows digestion, because our body needs to know like am I going to run away or am I going to stand fighting and so it releases energy to increase our blood sugar to allow us to combat whatever that threat that we're perceiving.

[00:29:54] And when this happens the other part of this biological event is that our hunger is suppressed and our sense of society is increased because if we're fighting for a life or running away.

[00:30:07] We're not thinking about being hungry and needing to feed our bodies.

[00:30:12] But what happens is that through habit, we've overridden this biological mechanism or we are unaware of it as we turn to food to help us destress.

[00:30:23] So we're like fighting against our biology in this moment of reaching for food at times when we're feeling stress.

[00:30:30] And in our overly stressed state of living, this can be chronic and it can lead to chronic illnesses and metabolic imbalances because your body doesn't need the extra blood sugar that's being released in response to the stress of traffic or kids fighting or work deadlines or managing your household.

[00:30:51] Chronic stress also raises the cortisol level in the body and this prolonged higher level of cortisol can alter its effectiveness to regulate inflammatory and immune responses.

[00:31:05] And so these emotional triggers that are causing you to reach for the ice cream are influenced by a thought.

[00:31:13] But sometimes that thought is so fleeting or it's just so habitual we can't identify it and only know that when we feel a certain way.

[00:31:23] We don't like it and we want to feel better.

[00:31:26] So at some point in your life you were feeling a certain way.

[00:31:30] You had this thought and it created this uncomfortable emotion in your body and you just wanted to feel better.

[00:31:38] So you reached for some ice cream or something else and it did the trick. You felt better.

[00:31:44] I'll buy it temporarily but ultimately a habit was formed.

[00:31:50] This autopilot programming became you feel XYZ emotion ice cream makes it feel better.

[00:31:57] But what's interesting is that over time, it takes more and more of that food to give you the relief or comfort you are seeking.

[00:32:07] And this is where those side effects of overeating and guilt show up.

[00:32:12] Because we don't have that level of self-awareness built up.

[00:32:16] Yeah, it's not always possible for us to identify what that thought is but we are aware of the emotion we are feeling if we start to tune into our body.

[00:32:27] And really start to understand and get curious about those physical manifestations that the emotions have in our body.

[00:32:36] And we can use these emotional triggers, what we are feeling to be able to work backwards in our mind maps that we've talked about in a previous episode to understand what is the thought that we're thinking that's leading us to reach for food.

[00:32:51] And then we can take that thought and analyze it to understand is it true? Is it useful? And is the fruit it's bearing in our lives good?

[00:33:04] From there, we can decide if this thought is one we want to keep or if we want to work towards uprooting it and planting a more truthful and useful thought in its place.

[00:33:16] When I first started my intuitive eating journey emotional eating was definitely an area that I needed to make changes.

[00:33:22] My emotional coping skills were garbage.

[00:33:26] Looking back, especially when my kids were very little and I was home with them and you know they weren't in school or preschool or anything like that.

[00:33:35] So I had my I had three under four when I had my kids.

[00:33:41] So they were all little and home with me, but looking back.

[00:33:45] I often turn to alcohol and food to deal with the stress that I felt of being a stay at home mom to these three little kids.

[00:33:55] Like I look back and like it's funny we joke about our emotional eating habits right? Like we kind of like, it's like we're trying to say hey, I don't like this.

[00:34:07] I don't really know how to deal with it. So we try to make light of it. We try to laugh at it, but it was like you know I'd have my three of clock cup of coffee to get me through the evening and then my you know five o'clock, Shiner, Buck, beer to help me make it until my husband came home right?

[00:34:24] And that was just a really terrible way for me to deal with whatever it was that I was feeling.

[00:34:30] And I was also dealing with the loneliness of my husband needing to travel for work a lot after our third one was our third kid was born and I didn't have, I didn't have good strong emotional coping skills.

[00:34:45] And so I turned to food and alcohol to try to make it to make it better.

[00:34:50] I was definitely not in a healthy place with regards to my emotions.

[00:34:55] And so when I kind of discovered intuitive eating and saw that it's something that could help with this emotional eating, it was definitely something that peaks my interest and was a pivotal principle in my life

[00:35:09] and being able to get to a place where I don't turn to food or alcohol to deal with my emotions anymore.

[00:35:16] It's actually kind of funny because there's still like some habits that are in place that like take me back to that, but it's like,

[00:35:24] there's times that I find myself standing in the pantry and I'm just looking around like, I don't reach for food because food isn't something it's not what I want, but it's just kind of like that act of like walking into the pantry is almost the queue that's like, hey,

[00:35:40] here you might be feeling something that you need to process, but I don't turn to food anymore.

[00:35:46] It's just, I don't know, walking into the pantry and it's like, oh, light bulb moment, I guess anyway.

[00:35:51] It's kind of funny how these things end up playing out, but when I started this journey, I hadn't really done the extensive knowledge and understanding of that mindset piece and that mindset component,

[00:36:07] the way that I know it now after being trained as a Catholic mindset coach, but there were definitely some things that helped me to get started to get my emotional eating habit under control.

[00:36:21] So I want to share some of these tips that initially helped me and helps with it giving you a place to start because the mindset piece and being able to understand these thoughts and to process these thoughts through

[00:36:37] this mind mapping are really a huge piece of being able to like overcome this emotional eating habit, but there are definitely some practical things that you can do to help you get started.

[00:36:52] Before, you know, really taking that deep dive and working with someone on the mindset piece. So these kind of tips are what I want to share with you to help you get started and things that you can start doing today to help with this emotional eating habit that you're trying to overcome.

[00:37:08] So step number one is to identify the type of hunger you are feeling.

[00:37:15] Now, are you feeling biological hunger or emotional hunger? You would know that it's biological hunger if you're experiencing any of those signals or cues that we talked about in the honoring your hunger episode.

[00:37:29] You know, that kind of rumbling tummy or headache or sluggishness. So if you're feeling these signals in these cues of biological hunger, then definitely give yourself permission to eat food.

[00:37:45] Sometimes our biological hunger and our emotional hunger can manifest itself in similar ways. When I talked to you about my anxiety, presenting in my stomach and just kind of this like nervous kind of anxious butterfly in my stomach.

[00:38:00] So I was first starting with this intuitive eating piece, this intuitive eating framework.

[00:38:06] I couldn't differentiate between the biological hunger and the emotional hunger because they were both manifesting in my stomach.

[00:38:13] So I had to get really good at being able to identify, okay, is this a biological hunger cue? When I'm feeling biologically hungry, it feels this way.

[00:38:24] This feeling that I have in my stomach right now doesn't feel that way. So then I was able to identify, okay, this is an emotional hunger.

[00:38:31] So if you're not feeling any of those biological cues of hunger, then you can know that the, that what you are feeling is actually emotional hunger.

[00:38:45] Because emotional hunger has its own specific set of cues and it tends to come on very suddenly and rapidly and it's like a craving for a very specific food, whereas biological hunger that kind of comes on slowly and gradually and any food with satisfied.

[00:39:05] Number two, identify the emotion you are feeling. This is huge. Our emotional vocabulary is not great, but when we can name the emotion it becomes extremely helpful.

[00:39:23] Where are you feeling this emotion in your body? Like being able to determine, I'm feeling this emotion in this place in my body and is this feeling pleasant or unpleasant.

[00:39:35] And when we can identify that emotion, we can start to give expand our emotional vocabulary.

[00:39:44] So this is where an online emotions wheel can be very, very helpful because it gives you the language to your emotions because often our emotions are layered.

[00:39:56] For example, the emotion of anger has several different sub types. So anger is kind of like this general name for our emotion.

[00:40:08] And so you may say, okay, I'm feeling angry. But if anger was like this blanket that was covering up the deeper emotion, if we picked up blanket up and looked under what would we see.

[00:40:20] So there's several different sub types of anger. There's bitterness, defensiveness, hurt, annoyance, resentfulness.

[00:40:29] Those are all, those are all sub types of anger and it helps to expand your emotional vocabulary because each of these emotions that, you know, annoyance, hurt, defensiveness, resentfulness.

[00:40:40] They all may present differently in your body. They all have this different kind of tone to them.

[00:40:46] And so the more specific we are about the emotion, the better we can be at identifying the thought that's leading to that emotion and being able to process it correctly.

[00:40:59] Okay, tip number three.

[00:41:02] Offer the emotion to the Lord. This is amazing.

[00:41:08] If our emotions are cues that we need to address something, we can view them as a way to grow closer to the Lord.

[00:41:18] Whether you are feeling a pleasant emotion or a negative emotion. So if you're feeling a pleasant emotion because you're excited or because something awesome happened.

[00:41:28] Take the opportunity to offer up a prayer of praising things, giving to the Lord for his blessing in that moment.

[00:41:35] If it's an unpleasant emotion, we can still offer it up to the Lord by uniting our pain or our suffering to the pain and suffering that Christ experience on the cross.

[00:41:49] It's also an opportunity to surrender to the Lord by letting go of your need to control the situation.

[00:41:59] And I think it's just so comforting to remember and to realize that Christ shared in our humanity.

[00:42:08] And because he shared in our humanity, he too experienced every emotion that we experience.

[00:42:16] So being able to offer this emotion to the Lord allows us to turn to him to help us process it.

[00:42:24] I think this is a key critical component as a Christian to be able to embrace and accept that God gave us these emotions as cues.

[00:42:34] And when we are aware of our emotions, that it's an opportunity for us to grow in relationship with him. I just love it.

[00:42:43] Okay, tip number four.

[00:42:46] Identify what you are seeking or needing. Many people are eating to fulfill an unmet name.

[00:42:55] If we know that our behaviors are the result of what we are feeling, it doesn't make sense that the behavior that comes from feeling sad is to eat.

[00:43:05] Or that if we're feeling angry, it leads us to eating.

[00:43:09] It's really the emotion of what we are seeking or needing that's leading us to reach for food.

[00:43:17] When you're feeling sad, there is it's likely follow following a thought of like, I don't want to feel this way.

[00:43:27] I want to feel better and then that thought, this thought of, I don't want to feel this way, I want to feel better is leading you to seek food because you know that food will give you the comfort you're seeking.

[00:43:38] But it doesn't give you that lasting comfort. Only Christ can do that.

[00:43:42] Okay, number five.

[00:43:46] Identify the thoughts that are leading to that emotion. If you're feeling sad or angry, why are you feeling that way?

[00:43:53] What's the situation? What's the circumstance? What's the scenario? What happened? And what are your thoughts about that particular circumstance or situation?

[00:44:03] Because that is the root cause. Those thoughts about whatever it is that's going on or what's causing you to feel that emotion.

[00:44:11] And this is where the real work and healing takes place when you're able to map out where this thought is leading.

[00:44:18] And if it's useful, or if it holds up to that divine truth.

[00:44:23] And then number six, create a coping plan.

[00:44:28] Have an idea of things that you could turn to instead of food when you're feeling emotional. It can be anything.

[00:44:36] Turning on music, journaling, calling a friend, just being able, I mean, read a book being able to sit there and experience your emotions.

[00:44:46] But it's important to have your coping plan thought out ahead of time.

[00:44:53] Because if you're feeling emotional and you're like, oh, what can I do? What kind of do you instead of turning to food?

[00:44:57] Like, you're too busy, like, kind of worried about that emotion and trying to avoid food that you can't really think of a coping mechanism that would really be beneficial to you in the moment.

[00:45:08] So take some time and kind of just jot down or list. So when those emotions are running high, all you have to do is pull out your list and be like, okay, yeah,

[00:45:17] I'm going to choose this coping mechanism because this is what would, this is what I can turn to in this moment.

[00:45:24] So I want you to give this a try this next week.

[00:45:29] You don't have to do all six of these, but maybe just take one and try it when you're feeling certain emotions.

[00:45:36] See if you can start to identify the emotions and where they're, you know, how they're manifesting in your body.

[00:45:43] That is even huge. Just to be able to identify that when I'm feeling stressed, it's men manifesting itself like in my shoulders and in my back and I can just feel it

[00:45:53] And saying, oh, okay, I'm feeling like I can feel us in my body. And so that means that I'm stressed, right?

[00:46:00] Just making that connection between your emotion and the physical sensation is really that first key step.

[00:46:08] Because it starts to allow you to use these physical sensations as cues and to help you better connect with your emotions. So then you can process them.

[00:46:21] So just see if you can start to identify the emotions that are leading to those emotional eating episodes, right?

[00:46:28] If you find yourself in an emotional eating episode, are you able to pause even a moment in that and ask yourself, what am I actually feeling?

[00:46:38] Or what am I actually seeking? These are all really powerful things. This awareness is a huge step in making progress.

[00:46:50] So even if all you can do is identify the emotion, those small wins add up.

[00:46:56] It's the starting point. You have to know what the emotion is in order to process it.

[00:47:01] Because food will always have an emotional connection.

[00:47:06] It's how we celebrate. It's how we show love to others and it's an expression of our cultures. Like, we can't just eliminate emotion from the eating experience no matter how hard we try.

[00:47:17] But we can learn healthier ways to process and manage our emotions.

[00:47:23] And I think it's just important to remember that like, God never said this life on earth would be easy.

[00:47:30] Go back and look at all the times in the Old Testament that the Israelites suffered. And they were God's chosen people, right?

[00:47:40] Through our Scripture we see numerous accounts of human suffering.

[00:47:44] And we can't always understand it. We don't know what can't understand why it happens, especially when it's happening to us or people that we love.

[00:47:53] But that doesn't mean that we have to be a victim to our emotions or let them run free range and just wreak havoc on our lives.

[00:48:02] By understanding the reasons that God gave us our emotions to help us experience life,

[00:48:11] and to help us connect and remind us to turn to him in times of not only Thanksgiving and stuff, but also suffering.

[00:48:21] To remember that he is always there that he's ever present and it just takes us turning to him.

[00:48:28] That we can begin to get our emotional eating episodes under control. And we can create these healthier habits that promote our overall well-being.

[00:48:38] So I want to leave you with a quote from Satan Francis Dacels.

[00:48:42] Do not look forward to what may happen tomorrow, the same everlasting father who cares for you today will take care of you tomorrow and every day.

[00:48:52] Either he will shield you from suffering or he will give you unfailing strength to bear it.

[00:48:58] Be at peace. Then put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations and stay continually, continually.

[00:49:05] The Lord is my strength and my shield. My heart has trusted in him and I am held. He is not only with me, but in me and I and him.

[00:49:15] Yay! Another episode finished.

[00:49:20] I want to express my sincere gratitude for tuning into the nearest to Blue and Podcast. Your support means the world to me.

[00:49:28] So if you enjoyed today's conversation and you found value in the episode, I invite you to subscribe to the podcast.

[00:49:35] Subscribing it just ensures that you never miss an episode and it also helps us reach more listeners like you who are seeking guidance and inspiration on their wellness journey.

[00:49:44] Again, thanks so much for being a part of our community. I'll see you soon and remember, Beauty Helped is the seed. Beauty Shared is the flower. It's your time to bloom.